The turn of events this eventide has created a lasting impression on me. The discourse with a friend inspired me to embrace God’s yoke and burden in its entirety without an iota of displeasure. Many a time I watched the birds of the air but never so intently as this evening when a pigeon landed on the windowsill outside my living room. If the pigeon had refused to accept the wings that God bestowed on her, what would be her plight? Imagine a pigeon incapacitated from taking her flight, just for a moment.

A pigeon’s wings are much larger than her entire body but the potential they provide to her is indescribable. She is liberated to explore the world in greater heights with these wings than without. Such is the yoke and burden of God for us. God’s yoke and burden will empower us to explore the unknown and reach the heights He wants us to reach. By rejecting His yoke and burden, we are shooing away the opportunity to fly high in the sky.

What is God’s yoke and burden on you? As I ponder this tonight, I can say my current toil with Multiple Sclerosis is God’s yoke and burden to me. He has thus enabled me when I am disabled, to experience His tender mercies and grace. He is certifying me to fly high in the sky with His promise that His yoke is easy and His burden light! I march onward as a good soldier of Christ to fight this fight of faith with Him at the forefront. I am already a conqueror through Christ. Will you please accept God’s yoke and burden without murmuring? Remember, He can lift that off in no time if that is His desire for you.

If thou knowest not who this is, thou shouldest seek Him.
His name is JESUS CHRIST!

Temptation – a deadly one the Lord of Lords says
Recognition – only through the divine wisdom my Master gives
Prevention – only by the armor my King provides
Jubilation – the height of joy the Lamb of God grants

Temptation – a dart from the predator, the winner resists
Fixation – eyes on nothing but Jesus, the winner fixes
Manifestation – power of the Holy Spirit, the winner experiences
Exultation – the ultimate cheer of defeating the devil, the winner so deserves

Based on James 4:7, “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.“

Based on Ecclesiastes 1:2 where it says, “Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.”

Oh, what am I?
Moved by passions so volatile
Carried away by the traps so beguile
Governed by desires so abaxile
Wandered away from my designer so worthwhile

Oh, what am I?
Stilled in storms so tortile
Pulled from the miry clay so intractile
Protected from the fiery darts so projectile
Purchased by my Savior so abile

Oh, what am I?
Yet, I am saved by grace
Atoned by Christ’s sacrifice
Redeemed by His precious blood
Reasoned with my Lord forever!

A lump o’ clay that toiled for desires so fake
Unworthy am I of thy take
Yet a vessel of honor thy fingers make
All meet for my Master’s sake

O’ Jesus thou art the lone lover of my soul
Thine am I and thine shall I ever be!

June 10, 2010 is another memorable day in my life where I believe God has given His angels charge over me, to keep me in all my ways. They did bear me up in their hands and prevented me from what could have been a worst accident. It was just a few days before that I had gained strength to walk alone a few blocks. God had kept me all through the remission and has progressed me far enough so I could walk alone a few blocks in the neighborhood.

My husband and son insisted that they would accompany for my longer walk on June 10th but I resisted and wanted to do it alone. After they both proceeded to my son’s martial arts class, I headed out to meet my very dear friend in Christ who returned from Australia and lives a few blocks away. The joy of meeting her and spending some time with her was much beyond words can say. I said a quick prayer for God’s protection and held a rose in my one hand and a purse in the other. After walking an avenue, I was getting ready to cross Northern Boulevard and half way down, I heard a car right behind me. Before I turned to look back, I was hit by the car and all I remember was me crashing down hitting my head against the bumper. I lost my consciousness very briefly and the next thing I know I was in a woman’s arms safe and secure but in a state of shock. I knew not the sense of pain at that moment but I desperately wanted to speak to my husband. Some one had already called the police and was ready to help me with placing a call to my husband. I spoke to my husband who said he will be there in just a few minutes. By then, I was shuddering all over and a gentleman covered me with something and calmed me down. It started drizzling and another gentleman held out an umbrella for me. A few folks sat next to me and held me in place. My dear husband came onto the scene, held me, planted a kiss on my forehead, prayed over me and said that God will help us out. I suddenly sensed peace welling up within me. The emergency police had arrived by then. My head was bursting with pain and when I touched it, I felt a very big bump which slightly scared me. The police tied me onto a board, with my head and neck in place. I started praising God for protecting me from death and very serious injuries. That was a busy hour (6PM) and the traffic was heavy yet God’s protection over me was heavier than anything.

After reaching the hospital, I had to go through a few tests with the head and neck braces on. I was ready to pull them out as the pain in my head and neck was nearly uncontrollable. A friendly family that lives across the street picked up my son from his class and brought him to the hospital to see me. As soon as he arrived, he kissed me and said he loves me. My son stayed that night at another wonderful family’s home. At the hospital every nurse that nursed me was gracious enough to lift me up as I could not move at all. All the tests and scans proved that there were no major injuries. What a joy and what a relief to me and my family members to know this! The doctor suggested I follow up with my PCP for further tests and discharged me. I said within myself that I will try and walk to the car. Little did I realize that the inflammation was severe and nearly numbing my entire right leg. When I placed my leg down and stood up I felt like my right hip and right thigh had just been smashed that left me almost lame. Immediately, a nurse brought a wheel chair and for the first time I was on a wheel chair pushed by my husband. I said in my heart, “Dear Lord, enable me to walk!” and cried bitterly. After reaching home, I gained strength to take a few steps to the elevator with my husband’s support. When I went into my apartment, I was overjoyed and started worshipping the King of Glory for bringing me back home safely. I just couldn’t sleep for various reasons and both of us prayed with tears rolling down our cheeks. We witnessed the hand of God operating mightily the whole of the previous evening and night. I could see God had given his angels charge over me. Through whom could the Lord keep His promises but us, His children? I said heartily, “Let your will be done in my life forever!” No need for fear or tear for God is in complete control over anything and everything that concerns us.

In a few weeks time, I had developed severe symptoms in my body. I went to the naturopath and he gave me a few medicines and advised me on a few things. I tried that for a week or two but the symptoms continued to worsen and a few times I could not lift my back up and needed support to get out of bed. I figured it is high time I see the neurologist. The neurologist mentioned that after the accident I seem to have developed new lesions in my spine and this wonderful man assured me that I will get better and put me through a course of treatment. Even in this, I could see God has lifted me up amazingly.

I would like to conclude this note with a word of gratitude to all those who supported me and encouraged me during my recovery from the accident. I am continuing to recover by God’s never ending grace. Journey with Christ is one that is never boring, ever challenging and forever transforming. If you are in your life’s journey without Christ, take heed and allow Him into your life. He is standing at the door of your heart and waiting for you to open it for Him. His love is ultimate; His grace is sufficient; His mercy is enduring; His peace passeth all human understanding; His protection is constant; His everlasting arms are larger than you can ever imagine; His comfort can soothe any torment or turmoil you are experiencing now or you may experience in future! Make Christ your Lord and Savior and life will never be the same. You will live your life like a King or a Queen as the King of Kings adorns your heart and pleases you at all times.

Song of Solomon 2:1
I am the Rose of Sharon, and the Lily of the valleys.

Jesus Christ is the Rose of Sharon and the Lily of the valleys.

The Rose of Sharon

The Rose of Sharon: The Rose is the most beautiful flower of all the flowers. Sharon is a pristine and fertile land at the foot of Mount Carmel. The Rose of Sharon is the flower that blooms and blossoms in the fertile land of Sharon. The fertile land represents a heart well-grounded in Christ. No matter what befalls, albeit a behemoth, the heart stays fixed on Christ. This heart waits on God, nurtures on the Word of God, goes by the Will of God, does not rely on its own understanding, acknowledges Christ at every turn and surrenders to Christ completely. Such fertile land is mentioned in the Parable of the Sower in Mark 4:20 where it says, “And these are they which are sown on good ground; such as hear the word, and receive it, and bring forth fruit, some thirtyfold, some sixty, and some an hundred.” If the seeds (the Word of God) sown fall on a good ground (heart in Christ) the fruit is a certainty! The fruit may vary from person to person. Some may be thirtyfold, some sixtyfold and some hundredfold. No matter what, the fruit is a definite result!

The phrase “Rose of Sharon” signifies that the beauty of the budded flower (Rose), on the most fertile grounds of Sharon, is incomparable to any other flowers of the field. The red color of the Rose represents the blood of Jesus Christ that is holy and divine. When we are adorned by the precious Blood of the Lamb of God (Jesus), the perfection and loveliness is delightful to the beholder. Does your life reflect the Rose of Sharon? Can people see you and get a glimpse of the glorious Lord, you say you so love? Does your walk reflect the Living Lord? I weighed on these questions for days and meditated on this verse. I sought the face of the Lord. I deeply desire that His face should shine on me. To my Lord I surrender and let Him have His way in me! Will you allow Him to transform you as well?

This beautiful deer is hearty and happy!

Psalm 42:1-5

As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my meat day and night, while they continually say unto me, Where is thy God? When I remember these things, I pour out my soul in me: for I had gone with the multitude, I went with them to the house of God, with the voice of joy and praise, with a multitude that kept holyday. Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted in me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance.

The above picture was captured by Ms. Carmie Rowell from her beautiful home and she courteously permitted me to use it for my devotional. As I was gazing at this marvelous picture of the deer above, I sensed that this deer was content strolling on the green pastures. I wondered how a panting deer would appear in its state of utmost expectancy to find the water brooks. This instantly reminded me of the song “As the deer panteth for the water…” and the Psalm 42. I dwelled on these five verses for quite some time and I positioned myself in place of the Psalmist.

A panting deer would have no desire other than an intense longing to find the water creek just so he may quench his thirst. The Psalmist is saying that his soul is panting after God in a similar fashion. His soul is panting for the Living God; not an idol that fails to hear, see, understand or sense the human longing. Yes, this Living God is the one who is all-pervading, the great I AM, the Alpha and Omega, the Creator, the Omnipotent, and the all-sustaining God of Ages! He is my Rock, my Shield, My Protector, my First-Love and the Bishop of My Soul. My soul hungers and thirsts for the selfsame Living God all-through. While the mundane concerns of this life may try to divert my focus for a moment, the deep passion and longing for my Savior pulls me like a magnet. Oh, how my soul longs to inhabit the courts of the Lord forever!

The Psalmist seems to have been terribly troubled by the countering question, “Where is thy God?” Perhaps he felt forsaken at the point in time for he was in a foreign land farther away from his own. In this foreign land he was deprived of this awesome privilege of worshipping with his people in the House of God. When we go through times like these, where we sense an abandoning in the spirit, that is when the divine longing intensifies and the power of God manifests in a supernatural way. When we are satiated in all spheres, the need for the King of Glory is very minimal or may be nil. The Psalmist is pouring out his soul in himself and crying within. The cry of his heart is to be in the House of God where he had once worshipped with the voice of joy and praise.

In the next verse, he is addressing his soul by saying, “Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted in me? hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him for the help of his countenance.” This is where we should exactly land on. Our hope should be in the Lord. Why should our soul be disquieted in us? We should be uplifted because our hope is neither in us nor in the people around us but in the Lord alone. Just as the Psalmist felt strange in a foreign land where his dwelling was only temporary, we should feel while we are here on earth. The earth is a foreign land for us because we are strangers sojourning here for a while preparing to meet the King in the everlasting life afterward. Even when we go through a time of despondency, well before it takes us, let us rejoice and praise the Lord for the help of His countenance. Seek His face that is so fulfilling than fixing eyes on the temporal passions that are sure to fade away! When we are filled with God’s eternal expression of joy, we will be exactly like the deer that is well satisfied in the picture above. Yes, our panting for the Lord will be quenched when we commune with Him. While a soul that doesn’t pant for the Lord is casting eyes on things that are mortal, the soul that pants for the Lord is seeking the things that are spiritual and everlasting. This panting soul for the Lord will feast on the divine manna and drink from the fountain of the Living Waters.

Picture taken by Carmie from her home

I have met Carmie Rowell on Facebook. Something about her made me visit her wall every now and then. When I visited her wall three days back, she had a part of her testimony typed in as a response to her friend’s post. I wanted to hear more of her testimony. Here it is as she shared it with me. I was thoroughly blessed by her testimony and I believe it will bless you as well.

I have been a christian for 30 years. We came under a strong word of trusting God not only for our salvation and finances but also for our sicknesses. I came into the walk with chronic colitis which I had since I was 19 years old.  I then started to hear teachings regarding God’s will that His children be well and that I was no longer under the curse of the law (Deuteronomy 28 lists the curses and the blessings).  I learned that while I had this illness it ought not be there.  I was new in the Lord then and of course there was much fear.  For some reason God allowed the most violent of trials (sicknesses) in the earlier years of my walk with Him.  I was newly married.  I remember that I wished to trust Him but it was more of a legalistic trust because I do not believe I was fully persuaded of the scriptures regarding His will to heal yet I felt pressure to trust.  Nevertheless, He met me.  I had suffered in this sickness which got very bad and I remember people at my house praying that I would be healed.  I trusted His words “that He would put none of these diseases upon me that he put upon the Egyptians that He was the Lord who healed me” (Exodus 15:26).  I tried to ignore the circumstances as best as possible as Abraham who was strong in faith considering the circumstances He was more persuaded of God’s word for Him (Romans 4) and what He would do for Him (heal His reproductive organs). One must renew their mind with His word.  Get the concordance out and look up all the scriptures on the area you need His promise in. In my case it was healing!  I stepped out in faith and also learned to hold fast in spite of what I felt or what the circumstances dictated.  This is faith (Hebrews 11).  “What things soever you desire when you pray BELIEVE you HAVE RECEIVED and it shall be given” (Mark 11:24).  The hard part is not doubting (James 1) because if one is wavering in His faith and does not stop he will not receive.  You can repent of doubt and just get up and move on.  I learned faith through my struggles with sicknesses.

I walked out tremendous times not wanting to eat but forcing myself as this affected my stomach.  It was never as bad as it was when I gave up the medicine in trusting God.  He delivered me then after some time.  I remember a release of the worse part of this illness.  He showed me over the years that whenever I worry or have anxiety it would start in my bowels.  As time went on I gained total victory over my mind and thoughts.  I could tell when I was in distress and worry and that I was to immediately give the burden to him. “Casting all my care on Him for He cares for me” (1 Peter 5:7).  I have not had this problem reoccur again but I must be on guard with my thoughts and the thoughts affect the bodily functions especially if one is in anxiety.  God wants us to put on the shoes of peace it is part of our armor (Ephesians 6). 

 The next trouble was after I had my first child.  I did not want children.  I lost the first child with a miscarriage and did not get pregnant for three years because I was in such fear of not wanting a child.  I used no birth control.  When I had my first child and had submitted my will to God’s in this area, I developed a black spot on my right leg which got larger and larger and gradually opened to a very large wound which stunk.  I did not know what this was.  I did not question God.  For seven months my leg started to rot and it spread all the way around this leg.  I lived in fear not faith.  I was afraid to go to the hospital.  Every time I looked at it, I was in fear.  I wanted to be in faith and not doubt but every time I considered the circumstances, I doubted and feared.  Doubt and fear are the devil’s biggest tactics against the Christian.  I had help with someone coming in to care for my child.  I probably could have gone to the hospital looking back but was serving God in a more fearful way then.  I would hop painfully to go to the bathroom and getting out of bed was horrible.  People would tell me from our church that I needed to go to the hospital because I was not in faith and that I needed to walk to act my faith.  This was not right.  Acting one’s faith must come from within and the fact that I was laying there was acting my faith really. I did what I could do. I was scared to go to the hospital because the wound was large and I didn’t know what would happen.  I made a decision to have my husband carry me and no longer tried to walk and hop to the bathroom.  I stayed on the couch and did not go to bed any longer.  I saw the scripture in James 5 that said to call for the elders especially since I was bedridden and that the prayer of faith would heal the sick and that I would be raised.  I remember calling them and they came and anointed me with oil and prayed.  This was seven months later.  I believe I released faith when I called.  God honored that. 

 The next day when the two ladies came to wash the leg which could not be touched for the open wounds when I put the leg down instead of excruciating pain there was no pain!  I knew He had touched me and from that day forth it slowly manifested.  It took a long time.  The people from my church later told me it was gangrene.  I did not know.  I borrowed a crutch to hop around on once this started to manifest and probably should have used one in the beginning.  I also had started to have problems with my joints and started getting arthritis in my joints.  It started at this same time.  Over time the Lord showed me the cause was bitterness toward my first child because I could not play with Him and felt he did not love me.  There was resentment there.  It took some time before I realized this was the cause. This illness went on for six years though I believed God to heal me right away but especially when I repented and realized sin was blocking the healing.  Still the enemy had a foothold in my life and did not want to give up easily.  While this was going on some days better than others, I had a second child.  After five weeks I noticed black spots again on my right leg and this time on my left leg too.  Oh, I was horrified and knew another trial was about to begin.  Oh dear I have two children now.  The black spots started to open and the wounds became larger and again it seemed like it would go on perhaps again.  This time though the difference was that I believed God and did not understand why it had to happen again though. I remember going over scriptures on doubt and God immediately gave me the grace to not doubt once during the time of this trial.  It was His grace.  The thoughts would come in and I would pull them down immediately no matter how logical they were. The loins of my mind actually ached with such strong warfare and that is where the battle is won or lost.  I had joy this time and knew He heard me and knew He healed me.  I was able to ignore the circumstances.  I had the same lady to help with my children while my husband went to work.  Our small church assembly fasted and prayed for three days for me and I had such an expectation that I would see a change in my body. I thought of Elijah sending his servant to check for rain…it was not in unbelief but in total belief and expectation.  I remember the next day looking at my legs and seeing no sign of a change but the following day looking and noticed that there was a change just an overall look that it was turning.  It had been a while since this started.  I remember it to be some months.  This manifested and I became pregnant again.  Arthritis got very bad my husband having to cut my meat and dress me.  Getting out of the bed was horrific one painful step at a time.  He would go to work and I had my two boys home.  It was most difficult.  I would confess the word in faith thanking Him I WAS healed WHEN I PRAYED many years before.  When this started to manifest remember I had repented of sin and it was some time later before it even began to manifest.

One morning I remember I went to sit on the edge of the bed which was very difficult because my knees had been swollen for four years and my joints pained me so.  I remember getting up from the bed and my knees did not hurt!!!  The pain was gone the swelling was gone!  I also kept my confession for my other joints and some would manifest while some had not yet manifested.  I remember one arm would manifest and I would just keep thanking Him that I would not give up until all He paid for me to have was mine…it was destroyed at the cross.  Jesus paid for the whole man.  Isaiah 53 said, “with His stripes we were healed”.  Matthew 8:17 being a fulfillment of Isaiah 53, “Himself took our infirmities and bare our sicknesses“.  Mark 10:18 part of the great commission says, “they shall lay hands on the sick and they shall recover.“ 

 I had also had all four children at home with two ladies from our small assembly in attendance.  This too is by faith.  My first labor was 47 hours but He caused me to endure.  We need to understand roots of fear and that it is the devil that would bind us with fear. Any fear as a stronghold is from the pit and needs to be overcome by renewal of the mind with His truth in the area you are struggling with.  We need to realize this is a ploy and tactic to steal our faith and our inheritance.  I also remember nursing trials that I went through believing God would not open my womb and got persuaded of the scriptures in this regard not saying anything to anyone not wanting to hear any negative information of doubt and unbelief from other Christian women.  We never used birth control and I believed God to keep my womb closed.  This took a real walk of faith and also the devil by fear would tell me I had not enough milk and I would nurse each time crying out to God and learned in a major way that fear was a feeling and not the truth and that I could resist the devil even though my mind was under tremendous assault.  This was a major trial. 

I remember one night my breast was swollen but would not tell anyone and I would force my child through the pain to nurse anyways and confessed the victory for days until the pain would leave.  I had learned of a woman in our church that had a problem with this but did not get the victory.  I remember this condition tried to come on me one night and I was awakened and cried out to God that this would not start again and refused to let it get worse; in my spirit I laid hold of God.  I remember actually seeing the swelling go down!!  I want you to know that the spacing between my second and third child was 3 1/2 years and so it was between my last two!!  This was all by faith.  I would watch women getting pregnant around me and their children being so close together in birth and hear their lack of expectation and no belief for anything in this area.  It does take a great cost and each time I got pregnant I knew I had to endure a daily mental battle with this fight for another three years and what I believed was one of His many promises.  It doesn’t come cheap.  God is faithful if we are not in willful sin and are fully persuaded of His promises.  Do not move until you are persuaded.  If you know it is His will as revealed in His word then get your minds renewed (Rom 12:1, 2) and please step out a little at a time. God will encourage you in love and not fear.  He will never condemn us.  This is the devil. 

While I was going through the first leg trial my son also was afflicted with hernia and would cry in pain so often my husband holding him and praying.  God over the years has delivered our children from much sickness.  I remember my second son being sick for five days not eating and just believing God.  Even recently my daughter now 17 had serious flu symptoms and some even said if you don’t take her to the hospital she could die if it is swine flu.  It was several days of prayer and pushing down negative thoughts.  She was even aware that when I or my husband would stand against fever that it would go.  It would come and it would go. “For all the promises of God in him are yea, and in him Amen, unto the glory of God by us.” (IICorinthians 1:20) So be it!!